Do you notice some people are no longer answering your calls and texts? You wonder what happened because you know you guys always have a good time… but what caused this sudden change?
You might think that you probably did something wrong. Perhaps, you did.
Or maybe, it’s just the way you drain their energies when you’re with them, unconsciously.
Most energy vampires are unaware they are one until they take a good, hard look at themselves and how they tend to be when they’re around other people.
If you suspect you’re an energy vampire, here are some strong indicators that you could be one and what you can do about it.
You Tend To Be Cynical With Friends
Do you ever notice yourself being (extra) cynical with your friends? It’s easy to think that you’re only correcting them by providing unsolicited advice on positivity. You might tell them, “You’re being too positive,” or something along those lines.
However, even if you think you’re only giving your friend/s a “reality check,” saying stuff like this, especially if it’s become a habit of yours, isn’t a good thing. It’s one way to bring people down without realizing it because you think being “realistic” will keep them on their toes.
You Dominate Discussions
Do you find yourself always dominating or guiding the conversation, leading it towards a topic you want to discuss or something you can relate to?
If you’re always sticking to your subjects of interest or downplaying positive news the other person is sharing, you’re not listening to what the other person is trying to tell you.
To establish genuine relationships in your life, there needs to be quality conversations that require a back and forth. If you think you’re guilty of this, it’s time to make an effort to be a good listener and really pay attention to what the other person is saying.
You Focus Conversations On Yourself
It goes without saying that you need a lot of energy directed towards yourself to be an energy vampire. Therefore, if you or people notice that most of the conversations you have revolved around yourself, then it’s likely you’re an energy vampire.
If you talk about yourself, how you think, how you feel, how your world is, etc., then that’s a strong indicator that you’re an energy vampire.
Be mindful of self-focused trends. If you only ever talk about your problems and beliefs and you’re not asking about the other person, the other person will feel its effects. And trust me, it’s not a good one.
You’re Overly Critical of Others
Energy vampires are often insecure, which means they will use dehumanizing strategies to keep the other person insecure as well. I know it’s not that easy to realize if you’re overly critical of others, but that’s why you need to pay closer attention the moment you notice it about yourself. If you tend to criticize other people, and sometimes, on a whim, then that’s a powerful sign that you’re an energy vampire.
Your Energy is Depleted
It’s easy to feel drained when you have exhausted the energies of those around you. When you’re an energy vampire, it’s likely your closest friends will choose to distance themselves from you. Therefore, you won’t have energies to suck on anymore, which will leave you depleted. When this happens, you will feel more down.
Other signs you’re an energy vampire:
- You get mad when your friends say no.
- You find yourself constantly talking when you meet people.
- You constantly need acknowledgment or validation from others.
- You love gossip and you’re eager to share it with others.
- Your friends are avoiding you.
- People in your life suddenly stop communicating with you.
- You’ve been told you’re too clingy or emotionally needy.
- You secretly love creating drama or making a big fuss out of nothing.
How Do You Stop Being An Energy Vampire?
The good news is, there are ways to stop being an energy vampire:
Commit to Heal
Being an energy vampire means you have issues that you haven’t healed yet. To heal, you need to commit to it. Choose to heal and grow spiritually, mentally, and emotionally. You need to take emotional responsibility for your actions and behavior.
Be More Mindful of Your Traits
Develop self-awareness by making an effort to get to know yourself. By doing so, it will be easier for you to see the traits that make you an energy vampire. Notice when you feel the emotional impulses, the need to act in the same negative vampiristic patterns.
Start To Practice Being a Good Listener
To be a good listener, you need humility and empathy. When listening, it’s not only about hearing the words but also being mindful of what’s not said. That way, you will be able to identify where you may be starting to drain others or not giving them space.
Get started on your healing journey.
It’s not going to be easy, but it’s going to be worth it.